Episode 138: How Healing Our Relationships Heals Our Health (Pt. 2) w/ Michael Vasconez

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HEADSHOT FOR MICHAEL VASCONEZ, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

Introduction

[00:00:00] Detective Ev: Hello, my friends. Welcome back to another episode of the Health Detective Podcast by Functional Diagnostic Nutrition. My name is Evan Transue, AKA Detective Ev. I will be your host for today’s show. This is the second and final part in a two-part interview with Mr. Michael Vasconez. In this 2nd episode we will be discussing how healing our relationships can help heal our health.

HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, CONFESSIONS, FORGIVENESS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

We are transitioning now in this second part, what happened to Michael when he started to be open about the many things he was doing that were not so great in his relationship with his now wife, Nikki. I think this is particularly important, not only because of the incredible health transformation this led to him having, and I know that sounds maybe a little disconnected, but trust me, when you listen to it, it will make sense.

It’s not only important because of that. It’s important because it challenges what I think a lot of people would believe to be possible. Michael committed multiple affairs. I don’t know what the appropriate word is there. Yet him and his wife still found healing through all of this.

Now, I kind of know these guys in person. They’re local by coincidence. They have one of the best relationships I’ve ever seen. I’m not recommending you go out and have an affair and then be open and honest about that and try to fix it based on that.

Focusing on Healing Our Relationships

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You should tell the person, obviously. I wouldn’t necessarily suggest doing that, but my point is, I think we all have a lot to learn, when we hear people like this, what they went through, their imperfections as humans, and how they were still able to come together to create something pretty amazing. We’re focusing primarily on how the relationships in our lives can lead to wonderful health if we’re taking care of them, and not so great health, if we’re not taking care of them. Similarly, how the relationship with yourself is kind of the most important thing.

He had talked about the healing that him and his wife, Nikki, did on themselves. That was the important part. That’s what led to the healing of the relationship. He went as far as to say in this episode later that he never worked on the relationship itself. Nicky never worked on the relationship itself. They worked on themselves and as a by-product, the relationship became stronger and stronger.

I think you guys are really going to like this one. I think it’s very unique even with 140 something episodes already, or just about, already in the books. So, without further ado, let us get to the rest of this interview.

Healing Our Relationships – Overcoming the Affair

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You know what, it’s actually a really appropriate transitional time because I was kind of hoping that this would come up. I’m glad that you brought this up. When Michael had come on the radio show that I used to do, it was only a 30-minute segment at the time. It wasn’t a full hour yet. People loved what you said, and most of what you said had to do with the relationship that you have with your wife, Nikki. Even what you just brought up, if no one else heard anything else, they’d be like, whoa! Like sleeping with another woman or sleeping with another man, that’s not something people talk about or overcoming the affair.

So, I think this is just such a cool time to transition and offer people some guidance with how healing the relationships in their lives can lead to better physical health. I know that’s something that you help people with too. Right? Let’s dive into that.

First of all, I think we got to unpack one thing. How the heck did you even expose these affairs to Nikki in a way that she didn’t just walk right out the door? Because most people would do something like that.

And you guys have one of the most solid, obviously authentic relationships I’ve ever seen. I mean that. I can think of two other people, Vince and Carley. My friends, Vince and Carley have a very similar thing. You guys are up there. Something like I aspire to. So how the heck did you even present something like that?

Healing our Relationships – Telling Everything

[00:04:11] Michael Vasconez: What happened was, I almost married another woman. I almost married another girl from Brazil. Three days before she was going to come here and then we were going to get married in the United States so she could stay with me.

My wife and I actually got divorced. And then we got back together. The taita from Columbia that I was working with, I drank with him one night and he goes, you need to bring your wife here tomorrow night. This is when the relationship with him and I began. I trusted him more than anyone in my life.

I said, dude, I’m about to marry another woman. Like you want me to bring my wife who hasn’t signed divorce papers here yet? And he’s like, yes, do you trust me? And I go, yeah. I didn’t know what was going to happen. I had no idea what was going to happen. She came, I called her up randomly and I go, you’re not going to believe this, but you might need to come drink ayahuasca with me tonight. This is her first time drinking it. She thought I was nuts for doing it. She’s like, okay.

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So, she came and that experience that night showed me that she is the woman I’m supposed to be with. Then the medicine showed me that in order for you to be with her, you got to tell her every ounce of every lie in your entire life, since you’ve been together. And then what happened, the experience ended. We came to in the morning, she laid down next to me, and I just started telling her everything. She just was taking it.

Healing our Relationships – Starting with Ourselves

Then as I was telling her, I started to get profusely sick. I broke out in a fever. I sweat through like four sleeping bags. I was shaking. I was shivering. There was snot coming out of my nose. I was like, filthfully ill. As I was speaking the lies, the sickness was coming out of my body. The medicine showed me the correlation between untruth and sickness in our body. So, I understood the connection through my own experience.

But as I told her, I continued to tell her details too. Like this wasn’t just like, this is freaking details here. There was so much lies in my life from the time we were together at 20 years old to like 26 years old, that it took me almost a year to get it all out. Because we forget.

That night I was so sick, I could barely stand up. I was like dying. The taita he just put his hand on my forehead. I was burning up. I had a fever, and he goes, you’re healing. I was like, yeah, I am. Then I drank the medicine again that night and it allowed me to rest.

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She went through her process of being able to take in all that and still accept me. She woke up in the morning and she said, if you want to do this, we’ll give it a shot. But not one time did we ever work on our relationship. We only worked on ourselves. The relationship turned into a separate entity in our life that blossomed like a flower. But the watering of the relationship is the relationship you have with yourself and your Creator inside of you.

Healing our Relationships – An Impossible Conversation

When men have an affair (I’ve worked with a lot of guys when bringing this in to their wife), there’s no easy way around it. The truth is the only way for you to have a solid, clear life. If you have something like that, that you’re keeping inside of you, that is going to keep you in a low vibration.

It might turn out as sickness. It might turn out as a symptom. The Western world would say is this, but the root cause of some problems are insecurity, poor self-esteem, childhood stuff, lies that you’ve been keeping, something you won’t admit to yourself or admit to somebody close to you, and that is sickness. That stuff was very prevalent in my life.

The whole next year, that is when I just started to get better. Like the more stuff I just got off my chest. Then years later, the perpetual inertia that you create catches up to you. One day you wake up and you’re like, oh my God, I’m present. I’m clean. I’m clear. I don’t have to hide anything anymore. I’m myself finally.

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Then you just start putting yourself back together, you know? So, when relationships need help, a really strong place to start is if they’ve been together a long time and something’s not working out, there is something that needs to be said. I call it an impossible conversation.

When you learn to have these impossible conversations with the closest realities in your life, which is your wife or your husband or your kids, and then right outside of that bubble is whoever you spend the most time with, you break down those walls, become transparent. You’re going to be singing. You’re going to be like a dandelion in the sun.

Healing our Relationships – The Other Person’s Pain

[00:09:02] Detective Ev: Dude, we have a lot of crazy health stuff and not that that’s not indirectly a health story. That’s just one of the most interesting and cool, inspiring stories that I’ve heard. I think there are so many people that carry around major secrets like that, and it kills them and it’s killing the other person in a sense.

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[00:09:21] Michael Vasconez: That’s the hardest part. It’s hurting the other person just as much, even though it’s your thing you’re hiding. They are not even aware of it, but it’s hurting them.

[00:09:30] Detective Ev: So, just to be clear, the unsigned divorce papers, the whole divorce itself, was going down before she knew any of this?

[00:09:37] Michael Vasconez: We were split up for like a couple months, you know? Because when I became aware of myself a little bit, I was like, there’s no way she’s going to want to be with me. I’m just going to ask her for a divorce. Then I realized, oh, wait, I’m supposed to stay with her.

Not only am I supposed to stay with her, I got to tell her all this stuff. So the next couple of years, life granted us space to be able to do that. I learned it doesn’t have to be so intense for everybody. That’s what you have to understand. The reason it was so intense for me is because there was so much there.

People need to realize how strong we really are as human beings. Just because you may have messed up in your life one time and you’ve been carrying it around for five years, you’re afraid that that other person might leave you or say that they’re done with you. Don’t think about them in that low.

Healing our Relationships – Work on Your Darts

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They can handle it because it’s just a choice to stay together. It’s not wrong. It’s not bad. Take away all the religion, all this stuff about just because you’re married, you need to stay together forever. Just because this happens, you need to leave. All this boxy way of thinking. This is your life. Some people are damaged in different ways. So, their darts to you are going to be different than darts from another person.

Darts hurt no matter what they are, but it’s a choice. Then when you choose to stay together, there comes a time in your life where you’re like, okay, if they aren’t working on themselves to heal these darts, I have enough self-value in myself that I will dip out. Because once I became clear with her, if one more thing would have happened, she stood up and became very strong within herself, she would have left.

Like there was no more messing around. She became transparent with herself too on all her inner stuff. And when that happens, yeah. When a woman is self-realized and she’s spiritually on fire, she does not need you. You better get your stuff together. Cause she’ll leave you at a drop of a hat because she doesn’t want to deal with that crap.

Cause it’s all about her relationship with her life. That’s when your life can really get set on fire.

Healing our Relationships – Give Grace

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[00:11:40] Detective Ev: I think the whole thing is just amazing to me because Nikki is an incredibly strong woman, right? Like you just said, it’s not like someone’s going to hang around. But the fact that she was even wise enough to give that grace as well, and give that space to say, hey, okay, Michael is trying.

I love what you said about the darts, man. This is so tough for me. It’s not like I have to deal with it, but I know I have this. Where it’s happened, Michael, is this idea that I would never, ever at this time in my life, stay with someone who cheated on me.

[00:12:08] Michael Vasconez: Yeah, you told me before.

[00:12:09] Detective Ev: I wouldn’t do that. That’s why I find your guys’ story so fascinating because it obviously has worked. So, I wouldn’t do that. But then at the same time, I realized that a huge part of my entire mental health story and the entire stuff that I do in schools (because most of the people that listen here, they know that I do some stuff in schools outside of this), I speak about how poorly I treated an important person in my life, a relationship I had in high school.

I treated them that way because I had, like you just worded, my specific darts. And guess what? My parents met in high school. They got married shortly after. They never forced anything, but they told me growing up, your dad or your mom, that’s the only person I’ve ever been with. Just so you know, that’s a possibility.

Healing our Relationships – Be Compassionately Humble

So, guess what? Out of all the messed-up stuff that I did, that to me wasn’t something that I do. No matter what my darts were, I don’t hurt other people in that way. I guess, because I learned this positive thing from my parents. They stay together no matter what, and it’s worked out beautifully for them as well.

It’s been so humbling to try to accept the fact that what I did is no better or worse than someone who does something like that, or someone who sleeps with 50 different people before the age of 20, because that’s how they’re trying to fill their voids. I have my respective ways that I did that.

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How crazy do I need to be to think that all the messed-up stuff that I’ve done is somehow better than someone else’s messed up stuff because that’s their outlet? It was a really humbling experience to have my eyes open in that way. The first conversation that we had, quite frankly, man, was one of those things that really got me thinking.

So, I appreciate that very much. Because you were a tangible example in front of me. Then I’m like this worked for them, I need to expand the way I’m thinking about this stuff, because it’s not serving me at all. That’s for sure.

[00:13:47] Michael Vasconez: It’s really good to have that awareness because when we learn from other people, we can really accelerate. Just learn from other people, we really can.

Healing our Relationships – Staying Open in Communication

[00:13:56] Detective Ev: So, I think at this point, it’s kind of clear how this might lead directly to healing, especially with this very dramatic thing that you had happen to you. You’re actually having physical sickness as you’re expressing these lies.

[00:14:08] Michael Vasconez: I’d never been so sick in my life. Like from my end, was sick.

[00:14:09] Detective Ev: That’s saying something actually with you.

[00:14:11] Michael Vasconez: Yeah, I was already sick. I didn’t know what was happening to me. I had blankets on cause I was so cold, like four blankets. I’ll never forget it. I literally sweat through them. You could have rung them out.

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[00:14:20] Detective Ev: If I remember from our first conversation, this is a literal thing where you literally don’t hide anything from Nikki and Nikki does not hide anything from you. To the point of you actually meant it when you said, hey, if I have a dream or a thought of something of like sleeping with someone else.

[00:14:35] Michael Vasconez: I had to go through that.

[00:14:36] Detective Ev: How do we get there? Because I understand the transparency thing and keeping it going. But a thought of doing that in my opinion is not necessarily an implication of an action or a plan at all. So how does it lead to that? And what’s the importance of that for people?

Healing our Relationships – Keeping the Chords Cleared

[00:14:50] Michael Vasconez: I say that because it’s a beautiful thing to have in your relationship that you don’t have anything in your life that you can’t talk about. How many times I’m around guys and they’re like, Oh, yeah. I can never tell my wife that, a simple fact.

A lot of times it’s like with maybe some sort of conversation they had with a woman or something like that. A lot of times it’s pressing on those buttons. But how many times guys would go out and do things and they don’t want their wife to know? Or they have money that they’re spending that they don’t want their wife to know. Or there’s just stuff there that isn’t in the relationship.

I’m not saying just because I have a dream like that I have to go out and tell her in the morning like I got to report to duty. I’m saying if my heart feels like I need to say it, then it’s being said. There’s no filter there.

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I have all this crap going on in my head. I had years of damage I had to process. I’m not waking up every morning going through all that. But once in a while, some deep stuff comes up and I talk to her about it because it’s healing for me to talk about. It also clears those chords. There’s energetic cords between people. When you have these conversations, those chords are cleared.

So, when I have a feeling like I need to talk about something, I talk about it. Whether it’s easy or hard, there’s no boundary. I just have it. We just talk.

Commercial Break – Try the FDN Course for Free

[00:16:18] Detective Ev: Hey folks. It is Detective Ev here, popping in really quick. If you are listening to this interview thinking, hey, you know what? I’d like to go do work like this. I wish I could help people with their health challenges. As you can see, it kind of changes the entire course of their life.

Well, now we have the ability for you to actually try the FDN course completely for free. There’s two things that I want to share with you today. Either, one, you can go to fdntraining.com/tryfdn. That’s fdntraining.com/tryfdn. That will allow you to actually try the first few lessons in the course completely for free.

Or if you’ve been listening for a while and you know this is something you want to do, but you have to get some questions answered, go to fdntraining.com/call. That’s fdntraining.com/call. So, if you want to try the course for free, use that first option. And if you’re ready to kind of get some more questions answered, use that second one.

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All right. Now we’re back to the episode with Michael Vasconez.

Healing our Relationships – Smooth Sailing on a River

I appreciate the specification there because I wouldn’t have worded it like that. But I guess in a sense, what I was taking from what you said is almost, as you said, like reporting to duty. I had all these kinds of crazy things going on. I’m like, wow! That seems like a little much.

What you’re saying is if something is bothering you, that there’s like maybe even a guilt around like, wow, I don’t want to feel that. Or I want to work on that. You know, and Nikki knows that you guys can go to each other and there is nothing off limits. Like you guys have each other’s back and we can share that.

[00:17:43] Michael Vasconez: We talk about ourselves and our life when we go for a walk in the park, when we are driving the car. We’re not talking about politics or family or stuff. Most of the time we love talking about business. We love talking about our dogs. But we have these deep conversations about our own personal lives too.

A lot of times we admit we realized we have self-realization moments. The first thing that we want to do is we tell the other person. I realize why I did this stupid thing a year ago or last week or whatever. It can be a little unnerving on how raw it can be.

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It’s not unnerving to us, but it creates transparency, which is free flowing energy. You know, it’s just smooth sailing on a river.

There’s No Reason to Yell

[00:18:27] Detective Ev: I have plenty to learn in this area and accept and integrate. But it’s kind of funny. I think I’m at a position where you know how they say what you don’t know, you don’t. Oh my gosh, I’m saying this wrong.

[00:18:39] Michael Vasconez: What you don’t know, you don’t know.

[00:18:41] Detective Ev: Yeah. And that’s like a real dangerous thing. Right? You don’t even know that you don’t know it.

Then there’s stuff that you know that you don’t know. I kind of feel like I’m in this with this stuff. I know that I’m unaware of it. I know that there’s still validity to it. And I see little bits starting to creep up in my life. I have a rule for my relationships now because I was terrible with this when I was younger.

NO YELLING, NO REASON TO YELL, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

I will not yell for any reason. That does not mean I don’t get angry. That does not mean I’m repressing feelings. That’s very silly. I will not be yelled at. I will not yell at you. There is no reason to ever do that at all.

Michael Vasconez: That’s good.

Detective Ev: Now, if you cheat on me, I’ll kill you both. No, I’m kidding. That’s just a joke. That’s a joke just to lighten it up a bit. But no, seriously though, I won’t do that. And I expect that not to be done to me.

Dealing with Insecurities

My current girlfriend and myself, Maddie, we honor that. That’s the thing that we do. And we have little things that come up but they’re really not major at all.

I love what you said about that self-awareness. There is this ability and forgiveness for each other when I’m like, hey, you know, I’m sorry I said that. That was like really stupid. That was actually purely like ego. I didn’t mean it like that at all. And she’s like, oh, okay. Thanks for sharing that and being vulnerable.

[00:19:39] Michael Vasconez: That’s exactly what I’m talking about.

[00:19:40] Detective Ev: Now I think taking that to that next level though with certain serious things like you’re talking about with certain thoughts, I think that’s tough for a lot of people. I kind of wonder where it comes from. Cause I guess in the back of our heads, maybe we don’t want to accept some of this stuff.

I don’t want to admit it, I guess. I would have to have assumed that even though I believe my girlfriend’s extremely loyal, that we’re still 26. Our biological drives are through the roof. I would assume she has had to have thought about someone outside of myself.

INSECURITIES, SELF ANALYSIS, SELF AWARENESS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

So, what do you think people avoid those thoughts for? Is it what I just said? Because I know that that would hurt me. And then where is that coming from? An insecurity in myself? Even though I know any rational human would probably have that experience.

No Fear to be Yourself

[00:20:17] Michael Vasconez: Sure.

[00:20:18] Detective Ev: I’m kind of actually feeding myself.

[00:20:19] Michael Vasconez: You’re feeding yourself right now, man. That’s the beauty of talking through this stuff.

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But we’re brought up, we are programmed since day one about sex, about relationships, about communication, about interactions with human beings that is from a separation, from a state of lack, from a state of fear. When you enter into relationships in just being a human being and you enter into it from a state of abundance, love, grace, and gratitude, there’s no fear in that relationship of being yourself. Because we’re human beings and we have these things that go on in our psyche sometimes.

To help the mind clear themselves, communication is a fast track of clearing energy. So, it’s not that you have to have these conversations. But with someone that you’re spending your life with, if you can use that relationship as a tool to get better, to ascend, to have a better life, you use the other person as a mirror.

If there’s something that’s annoying you in the other person, hundred percent, it is within you. A hundred percent. If something they’re doing is annoying you, it is you. It’s a hilarious game to play.

Healing our Relationships – Who You Are Without the Relationship

But when it comes to the insecurities about the person leaving or whatever, always remember who you would be without anybody. We always need to remember that piece of ourselves. We can lean on them, but we always need to remember who we are without the relationship. Because the relationship, it can keep you afloat for a while, but after a while, you have to rely back on yourself.

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So many people, they get lost in the relationship. Then any insecurity that comes up, their whole world would shatter because our whole world’s the relationship. Instead of just, the whole world is my life and I’m in a relationship. It’s a different paradigm that you can work yourself into, but in order to get there, having these conversations is kind of important.

Healing our Relationships – Primal Competitiveness

[00:22:25] Detective Ev: Absolutely. I like how you just worded that because I think that’s what the tease is for me. I’m certainly out of the first paradigm that I know for sure. I’ve never really been in that in a sense where like the relationship was my life. Maybe in those late teenage years, but outside of that.

I think we had discussed this before, I took a very independent approach, single for like five, six years. Yes, believe it or not, people, that was by choice. I had this time to really just focus on myself, work on myself. I’m not sleeping with people at that time. That was just Evan Transue time to really figure out who I am and what I want to do with my life.

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It served me quite well. I certainly don’t have the same thing of where, like, I need a relationship, or I need to be involved with things where it’s my whole world. But yet those insecurities still kind of linger. I just kind of find it funny. All I can do is laugh at myself sometimes. I’ll even see certain things that I’m doing, just like the competitiveness with other dudes or whatever. I’m like, I get that this is in me, it’s primal. It’s in my biology.

[00:23:16] Michael Vasconez: Of course, it’s primal.

[00:23:18] Detective Ev: I just never know where to draw the line with that. A lot of the insecurities come from these drives. I’m like, dude, it is 2022 man. Like what are you going to do? You’re going to compete with every single one of the 2 billion, 3 billion men out there. Like this is so stupid. It’s not even funny.

Healing our Relationships – Make the Instinct a Choice

At what point do you integrate more of the spirituality in your life that you know is there, that you believe is there, and see past some of that stuff? It’s not even inherently bad, it’s just, it’s bad when it’s causing insecurities and needless competition. I think at least, I don’t know.

RISE IN LEVEL OF THINKING, SELF AWARENESS, SELF ANALYSIS, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

[00:23:44] Michael Vasconez: The primal nature, especially of a man, those primal instincts, are part of the body’s programming for here on earth. As we rise in the different levels of thinking, we then can, instead of the primal instinct happening without us thinking, it’s like then they become a choice.

Then they become like an observation. We tap into them whenever we want to. It’s not like a need. Or we don’t feel insecure because we didn’t fulfill that primal instinct. We rose above it and we’re looking at everything from the 23rd floor instead of the 4th floor. We have a much greater perspective of ourselves.

When that happens, the insecurities really do start to fade away. The more you see yourself as an infinite, limitless being, from that space, there’s nothing to be insecure about. You are who you are. The comparison factor, once again, we are born into competitive, separation, and always analyzing ourselves instead of just being and living. Those primal instincts start to not have a hold on us so much.

It’s a really good practice to become aware of what thought and what desire is coming from what part of you. It’s like a constant observation of yourself.

[00:25:05] Detective Ev: I’m really glad our paths crossed, man. I feel like you’re someone genuinely that I look up to. It’s kind of like that thing, like I know I’m on the same path.

Healing our Relationships – Analyzing Yourself

[00:25:13] Michael Vasconez: We literally ran into each other many times.

[00:25:15] Detective Ev: Yeah.

You have more experience with this. I can see, I’m like, oh, this is cool. This is where this goes. This is what I can think about next. I know it’s working, it’s just, it’s messy when you’re in the middle of it. Thankfully it’s not as messy as it was before.

I don’t want to be dramatic. But it’s things like, this just happened. I actually haven’t even told anyone this yet outside of like my immediate friends and family, they know. I bought this car like three, four weeks ago. I’ve been doing the best I ever had this past year.

So, I buy this car and it’s not even the price. It’s just the type of car that it was. It’s flashy. It’s whatever. I get in this thing. It’s cool. I love it. I get into it the next day, I’m saying to myself, you are a jackass. I’m like, what are you doing? Like, you don’t even want this. It’s like causing me stress. It’s like, I already popped a tire on a pothole and stuff.

I went and exchanged it. Fred Beans, thankfully, the local car dealership, they got a 30-day exchange thing. I exchanged it. And you know what’s funny?

[00:26:05] Michael Vasconez: What was it? Can you tell us what it was?

ANALYSING OUR MOTIVES, PEACE WITHIN, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

[00:26:06] Detective Ev: Dude, it was like a convertible BMW. This thing is like ridiculous. Flying down 611 with this. I’m like, what are you doing, man? There’s nothing wrong with that car. I’m not condemning anyone who has that. It was wrong for me. I’m like starting to look at people and they’re like looking at me as I’m getting out of it.

Healing our Relationships – Willing to Work on Yourself

I’m like, what is wrong with you? You don’t do this stuff, not anymore. I hadn’t done something like that in years. So, I hated it.

[00:26:28] Michael Vasconez: Good for you.

[00:26:28] Detective Ev: I need to work on that first before I can have something like that because yes, I’m all about light. You know, I want my top dropped down. I had this thing dropped down in like 40-degree weather. It was ridiculous. Like I’d have the windshield on in the back and like the heat on. So, I was doing it for one of the right reasons, but I couldn’t get out of my head with that.

I said, cool, I need to work on this first. And I swapped it for a car that, it’s so funny, it’s still the same price. So, from that perspective, there’s nothing that’s changed, but it’s not flashy. It’s very practical. It’s exactly what I need for what I’m supposed to be doing. The second that I got that a few days ago, I was so thankful that they had this exchange policy because it calmed that down.

SELF ANALYSIS, PRIMAL INSTINCTS, SELF AWARENESS, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

But that’s the process I’m going through. I still have this awareness around these primal things. I’m like, did you actually buy this for any of the right reasons? And I think the answer is yes, about 20%. 80% of that was this false sense of like, I deserve this, which I did not in my opinion. If I can’t pay for it fully, I don’t actually technically deserve it.

There’s so many things. I’m like, you’re trying to show off, you’re trying to get validation from this in some way. So where are we missing this? Because I think I’m doing pretty good.

Healing our Relationships – Be True to Yourself

So where am I missing this that I needed something like that? I digress. I just thought that was cool. I’m working on a lot of these primal things with insecurities.

[00:27:37] Michael Vasconez: Good move, man. One day, you’re going to be able to have that car without that feeling. The truth of it is, you can drive that car just fine. When I have the cashflow one day, I want a brand-new, freaking coral blue, whatever year it is, Corvette. I would love to have a car like that.

And just like one of your buddies, or somebody you meet, is just like, yo, nice car. Here, you want to take it for a drive? Go ahead. You know, like, enjoy it. Well, you don’t even know me. I don’t care, man. Just bring it back in like 10 minutes.

ANALYSING OUR MOTIVES, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

[00:28:11] Detective Ev: And that’s the point. Without anyone looking, without anyone else being around, there is something so much fun about being able to press the gas pedal and the thing accelerates like crazy. The tops down, there is a fun to that. That can’t be denied. But for whatever reason using it for more than that, I didn’t like that.

So, the good news is I can recognize that. The bad news is there’s still consequences to that. The exchange. Dude, I lost like $4,700 basically because they’ll exchange it, but there’s still the taxes and crap like that. And I popped the tire.

[00:28:37] Michael Vasconez: Yeah, but you learned a lot about that.

[00:28:40] Detective Ev: Oh, yeah that was a nice $4,700 lesson that was a good slap in the face.

[00:28:43] Michael Vasconez: The experience was really good for you.

[00:28:45] Detective Ev: Yeah. That’ll work just fine.

Healing our Relationships – It’s More Than Just Labs

[00:28:47] Michael Vasconez: If you would’ve kept that car in that mindset, you would have kept creating decisions. You would have created your life. You made an amazing decision that most people wouldn’t have made.

[00:28:58] Detective Ev: Thanks, man.

It’s a transitional time for me. I think the pandemic slowed down a lot of that purely go, go, go side of me. You know this all too well; we do things at certain times because they served us at one point. I didn’t realize that was no longer serving me.

I didn’t need to be in that fight or flight mode all the time anymore. I’m not the kid who got kicked out of school and had a terrible reputation with no money. I’m doing better now. People trust me. I got wonderful relationships. You don’t have to keep going 90 hours a week to prove yourself. You got to do something else. I think the car was an example of that old stuff, trying to pull back at me. It’s like, no. We’re not doing that.

This is all healing stuff, guys. Just so people get what we’re getting at here. If you’re blocking these thoughts and feelings, if you don’t think that’s going to play a role in your physical health, especially the people that listen to this who already have chronic disease, you’re out of your mind.

MINDSET, THOUGHTS, TRAUMA, NEED MORE THAN LABS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

This is absolutely a part of your healing just as much as the FDN program and getting lab tests. We can figure out what’s wrong with your biology. If you want to do that for others, our program’s fantastic. But there’s a bunch of thought processes and trauma and stuff that doesn’t always show up on the labs.

That’s why we need this all integrated.

A Personal Evolution Facilitator

[00:30:13] Michael Vasconez: Root causes. The emotional root causes don’t show up on lab tests.

[00:30:18] Detective Ev: Right. So, we need to mix it all together. Why not?

Now, Michael, I want to talk about what you actually do. I think anyone that listens to this, the full thing, it is obvious that you know what you’re talking about, you figured out quite a few different things, and you got a lot of knowledge.

So, what do you do for people? Like if I’m listening, I’m like, this guy’s cool. What can you offer me?

PERSONAL EVOLUTION FACILITATOR, PRACTITIONER, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

[00:30:35] Michael Vasconez: If you asked me what I am? I’m a personal evolution facilitator. I help the evolution that wants to happen within a human being, happen. The three specific areas that we work on together, coach and client, is health, behavior, and relationships.

Together, we form a framework in your life that you can stand upon that’s going to help you create a health that you’ve never found before. You’re going to have behavior that is going to drive a new inertia in your life and to create sound relationships. When I say relationships, I mean with yourself, with your dog, with like life, with the earth.

Then, if you’ve got a wife, the closest realities in your life are the ones that we start with because they’re the most important. They’re the ones that are the most energy going into you and taken from you.

You gotta be in a symbiotic relationship with the people around you. So those things are what we work on, and we work on deep levels of detoxification of the mind, body, and spirit.

Deep Coaching

[00:31:42] Detective Ev: Cool. So, if I come to you, I have various health issues, maybe similar stuff to what you know I’ve already had in my life, mental health stuff, whatever. Where’s that process going to start? I’m not asking you to give away your secret sauce here.

[00:31:51] Michael Vasconez: Depending on your lifestyle, but pretty much there’s two or three things I start you off on. It’s very light. We’re going to look at the parasites in your body.

We’re going to look at your past history to see what type of heavy metals and toxicities in your lymph. We’re going to get the lymph starting to move. It’s going to turn the brain on. Then we’re going to start having deeper conversations on a special type of coaching I do that helps your consciousness expand.

DEEP COACHING, PHYSICAL AND MENTAL TOGETHER, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

It’s called deep coaching. We blend up here along with the physical together, we meet in the middle and expand your life and healing. And we go from there. We dig into your life, we work at it, and we get to know each other a lot. I get very personal with my clients, which is really cool. You know?

Work with Someone You Relate With

[00:32:31] Detective Ev: It’s beautiful. I mean, it’s a truly holistic process, which is really cool. I said this a million times already in the last couple of years, but I can’t stress it enough. I just love people who have so obviously done the work. I think they’re the most qualified to help other people. I know even from Hippocrates, you had multiple things. I get that.

But one of the things was life coaching. Right? I have a great friend. It’s certainly no trash talk on him because he knows how I feel about this. But he had posted one time online. Big influencer actually. He’d talked about like, you can’t be a life coach in your twenties, thirties, or forties.

I get what he’s saying, but then the question that I automatically threw back is, okay, so what age is it? And you can’t answer that question, right? It’s like, well, what is it, sixty? Sixty-three and a half?

[00:33:12] Michael Vasconez: I don’t think he understands what life coaching is.

[00:33:15] Detective Ev: Exactly. To me, regardless of even whether or not I understand the definition, I completely disagreed with that.

PRACTITIONER YOU CAN RELATE TO, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

I want to know that the person that I’m working with has actually overcome challenges in their life. Ideally challenges that are pretty similar to mine. So, there are certain people, man, that, yeah, I hear them label themselves as that. Admittedly, it’s not my thing. I know that you’re not labeling yourself as that even necessarily, but like, I would put you there, man. I mean, you should be doing life coaching and other things for people. You are qualified to do that.

Michael’s Starting a Podcast

You’re like my friend, Casey. My friend Casey is one of the only other people, I’m like, dude, yeah. That is who you want to talk to. That’s who you want to go to for this type of stuff. I just congratulate you for what you’ve been able to do. I mean, dude, you’re 34. Like what are you going to be doing at 44, 54, 64? It’s kind of hard to think about even.

MICHAEL VASCONEZ, STARTING A PODCAST, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

[00:33:59] Michael Vasconez: Well, I’m starting a podcast. So hopefully I’ll be doing that.

[00:34:02] Detective Ev: Yeah. What is that called? Because by the time this is out, maybe that’ll already be launched. So that brings me to my next question anyway. Where can people find you?

Where to Find Michael Vasconez

[00:34:08] Michael Vasconez: There’s two names in my podcast, I’m thinking about doing. One is just going to be the Michael Vasconez Show. Which seems to be a little bit more direct and authentic. And then the other name I’m toying with is going to be Spiral Awakening. I don’t know which one yet.

You can find me. My Instagram and my Tik Tok are both michael.vasconez. They’re my handles.

And michaelvasconez.com.

WHERE TO FIND MICHAEL VASCONEZ, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, FDN, FDNTRAIING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

[00:34:30] Detective Ev: Is there anything that you think that we missed today that we absolutely need to touch on before my final question here?

[00:34:36] Michael Vasconez: Taking care of yourself is taking care of the world.

[00:34:42] Detective Ev: Well, you might’ve already answered my last question then, but I’ll throw it at you anyway. Cause my last question – signature question – on the Health Detective Podcast is this. If I could give Michael, in this case, a magic wand and you could get every single person in this world to do one thing for their health or not do one thing. What’s that one thing? Is it similar to what you just said?

Signature Question – Magic Wand

[00:34:59] Michael Vasconez: A little bit, but when you wake up in the morning and the first thing that you think about that you should quote/unquote, “should be doing,” that’s what you want to be doing.

TURN YOUR 'SHOULD' INTO A 'WANT" CREATE DESIRE, FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

You want to turn that “should” into a “want” and that “want,” that thing, is the first step for you in transforming your life. You don’t need a coach. You don’t need some super guru to help you find that. Everybody knows when I ask that question that you have something in your life. You turn the “should” into a “want,” the want creates desire. You fulfill it and you get better.

Healing our Relationships – Finding Peace

[00:35:31] Detective Ev: Okay, that’ll do it for this two-part interview with Michael Vasconez. Wow!

Not only amazing topics, but a really unique answer for my signature question at the end. I don’t think anyone’s ever answered that in a similar way. It’s kind of a good lesson, isn’t it? We should go out and do those things that we know we should be doing.

I don’t think about that so consciously, but I have found a great peace in my life occurs when that happens. I don’t know if this is unique to me. I mean, I’m guessing it’s not considering Michael recommended this.

BREAK THE HABIT, START THE HABIT, CHASE YOUR DREAMS, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

But have you guys ever had those things where it’s kind of bugging you? You’re in a daily battle with it and you are basically hesitating, I guess, to make the decision to either fully commit or to do that thing at all, or to start that thing, whatever it might be. Then you finally do it. You break that habit, you start that habit, whatever it might be. And all of a sudden it feels really good?

I have plenty to work on in that area, but sometimes maybe that’s a good reminder. Because I know that that mental piece is right on the other side of that.

Conclusion

Not to mention all the positive things that are probably going to come into my life from doing that thing. I think that’s a really interesting tip to have on the Health Detective Podcast. I don’t think we would normally necessarily associate that directly with health, but clearly it could be depending on what that “should do” is.

MENTAL HEALTH, PHYSICAL HEALTH, TRANSPARENCY, HEALING OUR RELATIONSHIPS, MICHAEL VASCONEZ, FDN, FDNTRAINING, HEALTH DETECTIVE PODCAST

With that said, I want to thank you guys so much for listening. And thank you, Michael, for coming on and just being really transparent and throwing everything on the table. I think that is a very valuable thing for people, not only just for the physical health, but probably just for our own mental health as well.

If you guys like the information that we’re sharing, please consider leaving us a five-star review on Apple and or Spotify. If you were to do that, we would love you even more than we already do.

I’m looking forward to talking to you guys again soon. Take care until then.

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